wish it were sunday

I hate to be trite but this Monday especially sucked ass. I feel like I achieved nothing but spinning my wheels. I woke up in time to go to the gym but I heard the unmistakable trickle of a rainshower so I decided I would rather sleep in. As soon as I went outside my nicely layered hairstyle that took absolutely no effort to achieve cause it looked like that when I rolled out of bed turned into a wavy mess and I had to slog through a bunch of parking lot puddles to enter my office.

I immediately have a Problem to solve at my job. It ended up leading to an even bigger PROBLEM later in the day when I was really spent. I devoted my lunch hour to grabbing some takeout (which felt like it took an eternity) and completing a lot of what turned out to be pointless research. After that I was forced to deal with some completely unreasonable people.

The high point of the day was a bitchfest with one of my friends. We retired to my office, shut the door, and didn't hold back about anyone who was pissing us off. We briefly debated orchestrating different ways to get ourselves working together again and I hope it can happen but it probably won't.

However, when I checked my personal email account, I read a message from my fiance expressing reservations about going on a vacation we've been planning for ages. So one of the few things I've been looking forward could be down the drain. Between this weather and my upcoming aging memorial (i.e., birthday) I am just not in the best mood! In fact, I'm perilously close to drowning my sorrows in a loaf of kalamata olive loaf bread :)

afternoon delight

The past few hours were almost perfect. I left work early. Did some grocery shopping. Ate lunch in the comfort of my home. Rounded up my dry cleaning. Got a manicure and pedicure while reading my new issue of Allure. Checked out a newish bakery I've wanted to try forever and walked out with two scrumptious looking confections. Came home again and debated what to do next. Should I venture out once more and go to the library? Stock up on bottled water at Sam's club? Start cleaning in advance for the people coming over Saturday? I logged onto instant messenger to tell my fiance not to worry about dinner because I had it covered and was leaning towards the cleaning since I was back home and it is figuratively my "crack"...and he has news that rains on my little parade.

Apparently a couple we never socialize with anymore because I stopped speaking to the female half of that couple a couple years ago decided to invite themselves along for our Saturday plans. Um, no. I don't think so. And my fiance didn't think so either but now he is (understandably) bummed because he hates tension and he probably had to act like "the bad guy" and tell them no they aren't welcome - but if he is going to marry me he needs to get used to the fact that it doesn't really phase me to call a person out for doing something wrong. In fact, I relish pointing out the flaws in others and I am equally relentless criticizing myself. Sort of what being an OCD perfectionist will do to a girl. If you'll excuse me, I need to go get my afternoon back on track and make some essential grooming appointments that are sure to lift my spirits.

the search is over

I found my Laura Mercier Cancun Coral Lip Glace. You may not understand how relieved I feel about this rather insignificant discovery. Let me enlighten you about the "fun" of what I like to call borderline OCD. I occasionally misplace little items, mainly accessories, travel mugs, clothing, and cosmetics. The realization my property is not where it belongs is enough to send me on an immediate and frantic search. Usually I locate within minutes because I am relatively organized and very impatient. But every once in awhile I've really fucked up and stashed something in a place beyond reason and it will take me MONTHS to stumble across the item at large. I attribute it to being distracted while trying to straighten up, such as a ringing phone causing me to set whatever it is whereever I happen to be. But it could be pure absent-mindedness. Shit, it could be a brain tumor. At any rate, it is monumentally reassuring when I find items I've written off as lost or stolen. Like a sign I'm not losing my mind.

achtung

Project Runway is one of the best shows EVER. I always thought Heidi Klum was pretty in a cleancut sort of way but she looks gorgeous this season. If I'm ever pregnant, I hope I look as good as she does. The woman is absolutely radiant. The new blonde haircolor works for her. And Seal is her (newest) baby's daddy. I rock out to his greatest hits CD every now and then. Yay for Heidi.

I hate going to the gym in January. I used to be one of the only people there so early and now I have to circle for a parking space in the garage. Hopefully just two more weeks until the new members start dropping like flies and I can work out in peace. I haven't even bothered with yoga lately because I can't concentrate during a class if someone sets a mat up within arm's length of me. It just makes me seethe the entire time wondering WTF is their problem. At least I can move to an alternate machine if someone invades my personal space at the gym. I may try to brave flow this afternoon, since I have today off work I should take advantage of attending a class I normally could not due to that pesky 8am-5pm schedule I must adhere to. If the class starts getting too full for my liking I can always leave. Or fake a whooping cough to deter others from approaching me.

My fiance and I have turned into little chefs. Experimenting with new ingredients, trying different types of wine, making trips to the farmer's market. We may sound like huge nerds but I find that focusing on possibility and variety even for a mundane domestic purpose paves the way for a more interesting life. It also motivates me to buckle down and tackle the more tedious tasks I need to accomplish, such as wedding planning. Lately any telephone conversations with my mom result in both of us raising our voices and hanging up pissed off at each other. I've visited four decent bridal salons (including the supposedly legendary Kleinfeld's) but I've departed from each empty handed. Choosing a gown is probably the most stressful aspect for me. I am toying with the idea of designing my own but I'd hate to see the finished product and not be crazy about it because I would have no one to blame but myself. The problem is, I am super petite and the sample sizes hang off my body. Usually I love shopping but it is just not fun to leave a store feeling frustrated, and it is getting hard to psych myself into an optimistic state of mind to try again after being disappointed with each store's selection. I wish I could have my own personal Project Runway challenge and assign each designer to create a dress for me! Austin, Nick, Emmett, if you are reading, I need an elegant garment that will make me look beautiful! I'll pay you good money! I'll be your fruit fly forever! :)

todos completos

All of the Christmas decor and presents are nestled away. I'm "doing laundry" as we speak (does anyone else think that is a weird phrase?) and it should be finished by this afternoon. I've thrown three bags of trash into the bin. I'm hoping to sweet-talk my fiance into cleaning the floors as that is the one chore I absolutely hate (but I greatly appreciate the end result) due to the fact it grosses me out to see the piles of what is essentially filth that are underfoot moments before being swept and mopped up.

Later today I will roll to the library and retrieve my books on hold. I'm debating a shopping venture because it is crazily cold outside and one of my winter coats is kind of blah and the other is a little too attention getting for the evening social plans. Plus it will clash with the outfit I want to wear. It seems a LITTLE silly to own three winter coats as a Florida resident but I really don't possess much warm clothing. I am also considering a visit to a department store cosmetics counter for the ostensible purpose of finding a wedding look but ulterior motive of getting my face 'done' for tonight :) because despite all the domestic energy I've expended this morning I really feel quite lazy today. In fact, the past few weeks I've found myself skipping breakfast quite a bit which is unusual for me (that is generally my favorite meal) and sleeping in more often. Maybe I just need additional beauty rest -though my mom swears it is impossible to catch up if you miss your eight hours. Anyhoo, I am certainly going to try and prove her wrong by laying around the rest of the morning watching TiVo'd shows. :)

year in review

* What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done
before?
became a home-owner

* Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will
you make more for next year?
I don't make resolutions, I alternate between disciplined and lazy all year, every year :)

* Did anyone close to you give birth?
yes

* Did anyone close to you die?
thankfully no friends or immediate family

* What countries did you visit?
I didn't travel abroad in 2005, but I will be crossing hemispheres in 2006!

* What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked
in 2005?
mo' money

* What date from 2005 will remain etched in your memory?
when my fiance proposed

* What was your biggest achievement of the year?
professional advancement

* What was your biggest failure?
failure is such an ugly word! But I guess I neglected to get the puppy I thought I always wanted even though I have the space for it now because I determined I do not have enough energy to devote the attention a pet requires.

* Did you suffer illness or injury?
both, minor

* What was the best thing you bought?
kick ass furniture

* Whose behavior merited celebration?
anyone who managed to never frustrate or upset me

* Whose behavior made you appalled?
ha, I don't think I need to name names

* Where did most of your money go?
it boosted the economy

* What did you get really, really, really excited
about?
visiting Manhattan in the fall with my family/fiance

* What song will always remind you of 2005?
Mariah Carey's catchy comeback tunes - takes me back, back into time!

* Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) Happier or sadder?
Definitely happier

b) Thinner or fatter?
I'd like to think more toned.

c) richer or poorer?
Richer.

* What do you wish you'd done more of?
Sleeping/relaxing/leisure activities

* What do you wish you'd done less of?
Stressing out/wasting weekends going to the office

* What do you want to do more of in 2006?
whatever i didn't do enough of in 2005

* How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent it with family and future in-laws.

* How many one-night stands?
zero - hello, I'm practically married!

* What was your favorite TV program?
Just one? That is like asking me to make Sophie's choice!

* Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this
time last year?
Once someone really offends me it is like that person ceases to exist in my world.

* What was the best book you read?
My favorite author is Dean Koontz and he cranked out a few new novels that kept me turning the pages all night until I finished.

* What was your greatest musical discovery?
Satellite radio continues to delight me :)

* What did you want and get?
I got everything I wanted.

* What was your favorite film of this year?
I Heart Huckabees was uber-trippy

* What did you do on your birthday, and how old were
you?
I turned the weekend before my 25th birthday into my celebration time because it fell on a Monday.

* How would you describe your personal fashion concept
in 2005?
prim and proper by day, slutty by night.

* What kept you sane?
grooming rituals

* Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the
most?
I wouldn't throw Jude Law out of my bed

* What political issue stirred you the most?
the fact you need a license to drive, fish, or hunt - but not to be a parent...and the fact a woman's right to choose could be in serious jeopardy

* Who did you miss?
Nobody

* Who was the best new person you met?
hard to say, as I'm constantly encountering fresh faces

* Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005:
the person who angers you, conquers you

* Quote a song's lyric that sums up your year and credit the artist:
"don't want no drama/drama" Black Eyed Peas :)